A quiet walk

Tonight both kids were in bed a little after 7. Sam skipped a nap today (although he read in his room for an hour this afternoon) as he was excited to visit Grammy and Papa for dinner tonight. I tried a few times to get Sam to go to sleep, but after Matthew awoke from his nap around 2, there was no way Sam was going to sleep. So they both got up, Matthew had a short nap, Sam had none.

On the car ride home from Grammy and Papa's, (around 6:45PM) Matthew made a noise and Jason said, "I guess Matthew hasn't fallen asleep." I looked back and said, "Yeah, but Sam has." Sam's head was cocked to the side and he was asleep. I rubbed his leg and shook him a bit, but he was completely out. We got home and took the kids to bed. Sam awoke in the transition and we read a few stories, sang our songs and he quickly was asleep. Which meant that both kids were asleep by 7:30ish which is extremely rare. I came downstairs and wondered what to do with myself. I'm not used to this much time in the evening. Since it was a very nice evening, probably the nicest it was all day I decided to go for a walk.

I haven't walked for a long time by myself, without the kids. I started out and wondered what to do with my hands and arms. I didn't have a stroller to hold onto. I briefly thought about pushing an empty stroller, but then thought that would be really weird. So I walked by myself, hands and arms swinging by my side. It was a very quiet walk too. I didn't narrate what types of vehicles we were passing or point out things like birds singing, frogs croaking and fire sirens. I didn't point out airplanes flying overhead or choo choo trains going over the tracks. I didn't hear Sam asking "What's that, Mommy?" or saying, "I want to drive that someday, Mommy," when he sees a vehicle that he likes. I didn't hear Matthew babbling or making growling noises whenever he sees an animal--any animal. Instead I enjoyed the birds singing and wind blowing by myself, but it wasn't quite the same.

I didn't stop at all either. I didn't stop to show the kids an animal--like the ducks or geese we usually see, or the huge catfish/bullheads we saw the other day when we were walking around a local lake. We went walking early one day this week and in a shallow area of a local lake there were hundreds of sunfish swimming around and maybe six or eight 15-18 inch catfish/bullheads (I wasn't close enough to tell what they were) slithering below the surface of the water, their backs barely skimming the surface, leaving a snaking line through the water. I picked up Sam and exclaimed, "Holy cow, look at those huge fish!" and we all enjoyed the sight. I didn't stop at any of the playgrounds I passed tonight (there were 3 of them). I didn't stop to pick up dropped water bottles, snack cups or Hot Wheels. There was none of that tonight, just walking, uninterrupted, getting some exercise.

While I got some good exercise tonight and was able to do what I wanted, when I wanted, uninterrupted, I did rather miss my walking companions. Even if they are 1 and 2 years old with limited vocabularies (at least for Matthew, but he's only one!), they bring a lot of fun to a kind of mundane activity and open my eyes to the world in different ways. Fortunately I think I have a few more years of walking with kids, especially with another on the way...although I don't know how I will go walking with 3 kids. Maybe Sam can jog alongside me...he always seems to have plenty of energy and this would give him a positive outlet.