Earliest memories

Dear Sam,

Last night Jason and I were talking and I was saying how I would probably approach the John Deere electric riding toy the same way you did--tentatively. You see, yesterday was the first day you really relished in riding the little John Deere at Grammy and Papa's. Not only did you relish it, but your were pretty much overjoyed as you drove the tractor around the driveway and sang incoherent songs which Jason thought were in German. Anyway, you initially were scared to even sit on it, but Daddy and Papa nudged and urged you to try it and took baby steps (running it while you walked beside, sitting on it without it moving, slowly moving, then off you go!) and eventually you warmed up to it. I think I probably would have done the same thing. I was always more tentative and careful with things, preferring to watch before jumping right in to something. Some call it fearful, I call it careful.

Jason joked that he wouldn't have approached the John Deere in that way, he said he was way to big for it. Silly Daddy. He knew that I meant I would have acted that way when I was a little kid, not right now, then I started teasing him about being old and not being able to remember his early years. We then reminisced about my earliest memories which are from when I was three years old. And you're almost there now. It's a little scary for me to think that you may retain some memories from your third year and time will only tell what you will hold onto. But for now, you'll have to deal with my earliest memory.

I remember going to Chicago when I was three with my mom, Grandma Sue. We went to the Lincoln Park Zoo and I remember riding in the backseat of the car on the way there and it was raining. When we got to the zoo there was a huge line of strollers for rent since the zoo wasn't busy because of the rain. I can vividly remember the line of strollers just outside the zoo. I can't remember any of the animals, but I remember the strollers. More importantly, I remember what wasn't on this trip to Chicago and the zoo. It was my sister, Aunt Jessica. I remember feeling quite smug that my sister had to go to school and couldn't go to the zoo, but I got to go. I felt so important. How's that for human nature? Attached to my earliest memory isn't the joy of seeing exotic animals, but enjoying something that my sister couldn't. It's funny to think that my earliest memory includes such details, but it's also a reminder of the reality of the ugly side of human nature. Watch out for that.

Soon you'll be able to remember things from your life too and you'll share stories with others just like I am now. Hopefully, they'll be good stories and you won't remember the uglier side of my nature which you sometimes see these days, and as we've all seen, has been present from the beginning. Time will only tell what your little mind will retain and relish and share in later years.