Playground socialization

You may think that I'm going to talk about how Sam or Matthew socializes with other kids at the playground, but you'd be mistaken. I'm going to talk about parental socialization. We spend a fair amount of time at playgrounds these days. I'd say we probably head to a playground two or three days a week. Often there are no other kids or families at the playground when we go, but there are plenty of times when there are other kids and parents around. And let me tell you, it can be rather awkward to be a parent at a playground these days.

Sam is a pretty independent player when we go to the playground, and I don't have to worry about him falling off the structure or climbing on structures he can't handle. Matthew, on the other hand, requires close supervision since he is still fairly unsteady, but thinks he is SuperMonkey like his brother and tries to do everything. So I follow closely. And I often come in close contact with other parents who are also following closely their little toddlers. What's so strange is that eye contact with other parents is hard to come by even though we come within feet of each other. It's really odd, uncomfortable and awkward to me to be so close to another adult and not make eye contact and say hello or make a comment about the weather or the kids. So awkward.  Just like I feel awkward sitting on the bus right next to another person but not talking because they're texting or listening to music. Weird. Now, I'm introverted so I'd often just rather say nothing than engage in conversation, but the close proximity compels me to say something and acknowledge one another's presence. Maybe it's that I grew up in a small town where you knew most people and said "Hello" or "Good morning" when passing on the street. I don't know. But Jason has noticed the strange parental culture too and he didn't grow up in a small town. He even has gone so far as to suggest that he really dislikes going to the Children's Museum as the parental culture is so engrossed in one's children, to the neglect of any adult conversation or acknowledgement.

Anyway, I'll be following Matthew up the stairs of the play structure and another mom will be helping her kid down the slide a few feet away and we'll both be talking to our toddlers who really can't talk back, but not talking or even looking at each other at all. I get uncomfortable just writing about this. The other day, a mom who I repeatedly tried to make eye contact with and say hello but she just wouldn't look at me (am I an alien or something?) said "Good bye" to Matthew when they were leaving! What's that about? Seriously uncomfortable and awkward! Well, whenever I'm able to make eye contact with another parent I inevitably overcome my introvertedness and say my typical opening line, "How old is your little one(s)?" The other parent always responds and we generally have friendly conversation from that point on and avoid the awkward situation in which we're only talking to and acknowledging our children. We can then talk about our kids' shoes, naps, snacks, playground disasters, jobs, groceries and many other topics that parents have in common with one another.

But why is it so hard to begin? Why the avoidance, if I may call it that? I really don't know. I actually enjoy the conversation, but maybe that's because I stay home with my little kids all day and don't get a lot of parental conversation. I could go on and on about similar scenarios, not just the playground, and not just involving parents, where people ignore each other as they're paying attention to their kids, or their "cell phones or other electronic devices" but I'll stop here for now. Can't we just say "Hi" or "Good morning"? Is it really that hard?