Dilemmas

Today as I was trying to hang up some coat hooks in our front closet, Matthew was having a rather hard time with not having my full attention. Sometimes he gets like that. He's a toddler, so I suppose that's normal, but sometimes I just want to get things done. So then I consider what I can do for him or give him to keep him happy and let me have 5 or 10 minutes to finish up whatever project I'm working on. And then there's the dilemma. Do I give Matthew my time and attention and ignore my project? Well, sometimes that happens. But today we already read some books and colored, so he definitely wasn't being neglected. He wasn't interested in our regularly accessible toys, so then I move on to considering more novel things. Is there a toy he hasn't played with for awhile? Something high up on a shelf? Is there something (not a toy) noisy and interesting to a little guy that I can give him that won't be dangerous? Like crinkled aluminum foil...or a few spoons to bang together? Hmmmm...What do I do? Well, today I actually thought that maybe Matthew was tired and needed a nap and sure enough, he went down for a nap without a peep and I was able to finish hanging the coat hooks and hang some other organizers in the laundry room.

Other times, though, the dilemma isn't so easily solved. This often occurs when I'm in the kitchen trying to get lunch or dinner ready. This is a common time for Matthew to complain and he often tries to wedge himself between my legs and the cabinets and reaches his arms up to me (all the while loudly complaining) to hold him. I have a number or tricks I use in this case, but all involve a dilemma. Like I know Matthew likes to take freezer bags out of their little paperboard box and spread them over the kitchen floor and crinkle them up and so on. I know he likes this activity and it may buy me the time I need to finish, but then I also have to pick them all up at the end. And he likes to get pop cans (unopened) out of the pantry and walks around pretending to drink their contents. But then he leaves them in random locations. So I have to pick them up. He likes to get into the baking cabinet and pull out measuring cups and bang them together, but then he ends up taking things out of the cabinet (like a mixing bowl or the baking powder) and leaving them near the stairs, on the ottoman or at various places on the floor. And then I pick them up. I get my work done, but I have to spend time putting things back together. I guess I assume that the net outcome is positive (in terms of time, happiness and peacefulness), but the drawbacks are more picking up work and a sore back (which is an almost constant for me during pregnancy).

Another dilemma has to do with putting toys and other kid items at kid level. On one hand, they can reach them and get them out on their own, but on the other hand, they might just randomly get out a bunch of stuff and leave it everywhere without really even playing with it. Sam is old enough that he has to pick up after himself and we have plenty of tricks up our sleeves to encourage picking up (i.e. "Sam, you can play outside when you pick up all your books" or "Sam, your snack is ready when you're done putting cars away"), but Matthew is just plain to little for that yet and yet he is a major culprit in randomly picking up toys and taking them everywhere...the laundry room, the pantry, the bathroom, the kitchen...So the kids can get what they want when they want without asking or needing assistance (which is helpful when they can't really talk yet), but then we can a huge mess on our hands. Ugh.

Matthew also really likes our craft items. I have a little plastic container with colors and markers in it and another with random stuff like paintbrushes, watercolor paints, glue sticks and glue bottles. While Matthew doesn't do too much crafty yet (he colors some with assistance) he just loves getting into the craft containers and exploring their contents. He can't open the glue or other messy items yet, so I often just let him explore. He loves to chew on paintbrushes and empty and refill the crayon/marker container, but there are often remnants of his exploring left in various places around the house. What to do? I want them accessible so Sam can get them out and Matthew really likes to explore them, but then they're everywhere! For now, I settle for picking things up a lot and giving the kids more freedom to explore and play when they want to and where they want to. Is the net result really positive? I believe so, although my belief may very well be delusional. In any event, this is a short-lived phase of toddler life and maybe someday I will look fondly back at these days. Maybe not, but I'll at least be optimistic.